Vive l’entente Bondiale!

Ou... une célébration de la contribution des acteurs français qui ont joué dans des films de James Bond

There’s always been a special deliciousness in the way French actors have delivered their lines in Bond films. Maybe it’s down to the actor, maybe it’s just the accent. Either way, they've left an indelible mark.

With the unconfirmed news that Léa Seydoux will star in Bond 24, I thought I’d look at the various contributions French actors have made to the Bond films so far.

The films’ first full-on foray into Frenchness came in 1965 with Claudine Auger as Domino Derval in Thunderball. Auger was crowned Miss France in 1958 at the age of 15 (AHEM), studied drama at the Conservatoire de Paris (as did Bérénice Marlohe - but more of her later), and gave birth to her first child aged 49. It’s a shame she was dubbed by Nikki van der Zyl, but if you want to hear her in her native tongue, here she is.

"Auger. It's pronounced 'oh-zhay'. Okay?"

The rest of the 60s and most of the 70s were a bit barren for French actors in the Bond films. That is until The Spy Who Loved Me in 1977 and Nîmes-born Vernon Dobtcheff’s turn as club owner Max Kalba (aside: how fucking annoying was the music in the Mojave Club?). He didn’t last long before Jaws bumped him off, but I’m sure someone would have done so eventually due to the club’s music policy. Vernon is still working, by the way, and celebrated his 80th birthday in August.

*VERNFACT: he played an elderly Nazi in Father Ted. Proof.

Next up is the quintessential Bond villain, Moonraker’s Hugo Drax, played by the velvety-voiced Michael Lonsdale. To the delight of the audience, Drax revels in his verbal barbs against Bond. I think he has the best one-liners of any Bond villain, among my favourites: “James Bond. You appear with the tedious inevitability of an unloved season.” Judge for yourself.

"Look after Mr. Bond. See that some harm comes to him."

Given that Moonraker was mostly shot in France, it's understandable that French actors were peppered throughout the production. Corinne Cléry gives an adequate performance as Corinne Dufour but, again, Nikki van der Zyl dubbed her real voice on-screen, but you can hear her (and see her romp around on a giant hand!) here. Fellow French actor Blanche Ravalec pops up - and almost out - as Jaws’ girlfriend Dolly.

*BLANCHEFACT: she narrated the French version of Thomas the Tank Engine.

Carole Bouquet is next up, essaying the role of vengeful Melina Havelock in For Your Eyes Only. Melina shows an understated independence from her very first scene and is quite happily bumping off her parents’ assassin before she even meets Bond. In fact, I’d argue that character gets duller from the moment she meets Bond.

*CAROLEFACT: she is the luckiest person alive, in that she no longer goes out with the dick that is Gerard Depardieu.

To the mid-80s now and France is next represented by Jean Rougerie, playing detective Achilles Aubergine in A View To A Kill. He doesn’t make it past the soup course, but does display an excellent moustache.

In The Living Daylights, French native (although half-Dutch, half Georgian by parentage) Maryam D’Abo shines through as Kara Milovy in spite of a nasty raincoat. With her awkward charm, she set my pulse raising a little above average and was the reason I took up the cello for a whole week in 1988.

"You're English?"

Tcheky Karyo’s Defence Minister Dmitri Mishkin in Goldeneye in 1995 was the only main French actor to crop up in the Pierce Brosnan years UNTIL Sophie Marceau in The World Is Not Enough.

Like Carole Bouquet, she played the wronged daughter of a murdered father, but her complicity in his killing and her ability to beguile and manipulate people around her sets her on another level. Marceau is a phenomenal actor, crowned by her butter-wouldn’t-melt half-pout, her wicked laugh as Bond chases her, and her smirking pronouncement to Bond: “You wouldn’t kill me. You’d miss me.” Pure class.

WANTED: for crimes against Dame Judi

The Daniel Craig era has continued this superb run of hiring superlative French actors. Parkour genius Sébastien Foucan gets Casino Royale off to a flying start, leaping off scaffolding as Mollaka.

But while Foucan only lasts 18 minutes into the film, it’s Eva Green’s Vesper Lynd who dominates with the sheer quality of her acting, marking her out as one of the finest talents ever to appear in a Bond film. In Mark O’Connell’s excellent book Catching Bullets (available here), he sums it up better than I could:

“Green plays Vesper as a sort of Evil Under The Sun chanteuse – all 1930s gowns, hats and curls finished off with a sort of Emo-duchess poise and Roedean accent. Enabling Craig to shape his 007, Green has the finest acting chops of many a Bond squeeze with a curious mix of Maud Adams’ grace and Diana Rigg’s balls”.

"Don't look at the necklace. Seriously, don't. It'll give the whole game away"

Casino Royale represented the peak of French acting involvement of the Bond films so far. Unfortunately, Quantum of Solace's Mathieu Amalric is not as successful as Michael Lonsdale in the Bond baddie stakes; he’s creepy but unconvincing (as I stated in a previous entry) although I concede this is more to do with the poor script and direction than to Amalric himself.

And that brings us on to our final French actor, the criminally underused Bérénice Marlohe in Skyfall. As a Bond film, it's definitely one of the best, but the character of Severine is one of the drawbacks. There’s just not enough of her, although I see how the writers didn’t want anyone to intrude on the Bond-M-Silva dynamic and that’s a real shame.

"I've got to tap the ash of this cigarette or it'll go EVERYWHERE"

I hope this upward trend of quality French actors continues. So, come on Babs and Michael: more Lonsdale, Greens and Marceaus please. 

Will Léa Seydoux join their ranks?

Countdown to Skyfall: Quantum of Solace Assessed Acrostically

So just 1 day until Skyfall and it's important to remember how we got here and what came before.

Unfortunately, what came before was Quantum Of Solace. And it ain't great.

"Quit now", I thought, when the credits rolled at the end of this film.  

Bond has had an excellent 46-year run but if *this* is the direction we’re heading in, let’s just call it quits. We're all fucked. The film is one of the oddest in the entire series: jumpy, uneasy, convoluted, part-character story, part-action movie. All in all, a bit of a mess.

Uninspiring locations punctuate this film. I mean, Bolivia? Really?

And the Paleo in Siena? It looks alright I suppose, but it's no Rio carnival or Junkanoo, is it?! Long gone, it seems, when they actually planned to have exotic locations.

Arterton cannot act. She is embarrassing in this film.

Her character is so weak and does absolutely nothing to stand in Bond's way which it is HER JOB to do. And then she shags him. It's as if she's been transported from a 1970s Roger Moore Bond film. And that raincoat makes her look like a hooker. And that stupid name...

Not even 20 minutes in to this and I was lost; yes, the plot.

So all it’s going along nicely at first: furious car chase, bit o’ business with M in a sewer, rooftop chase, quick stop at The Barbican. Then, (almost) suddenly Bond is beating the shit out of some guy in a Bolivian hotel room, getting into a car with a strange woman and - what - is he supposed to kill her? Then there are some docks, the first look at our villain and then a general arrives in a speedboat. All this while Dame Judi is trying to act in front of bafflingly twatty white-on-white computer graphics. And THAT's just the first 25 or so minutes. Crazy.

The chase, fight and action sequences are almost top-notch.

In fact, I found them much better on my most recent viewing than I remember. The stand-out ones are the rooftop chase in Siena and the final fight in the hotel. The opera scene features below.

Uh-oh, someone’s been playing too many video games.

And, yes, that's you, Marc Forster. I absolutely loved Finding Neverland but QoS does not paint him in a good light. At times his direction is amateurish and his editing too abrupt. Without wishing to sound too old-gittish about it, the camera was moving about too much. No wonder this film is the shortest one of the series... if he'd have kept a few more milliseconds in every shot the damn thing would last over 3 hours.

Mathis. What a waste. I know Bond's a killer and all that jazz but poor old Rene.

Used as a human shield and dumped in a bin. With friends like that...

Olga Kurylenko is what makes this film worth watching.

Camille's back story - as tortuous as it is to follow - is at least credible and provides her with sufficient motivation to pursue General Medrano. Her performance is tough and vulnerable. And I quite like the fact that she doesn't sleep with Bond at the end. It would have been too easy.

Follow this link if you want to know about the theme tune (it’s no. 9)

Some of it I liked, in particular the way Bond and Camille's stories intertwine.

When they arrive in the desert towards the end, they are both within reaching distance of their prey. And after the big fight, I really enjoyed the car scene where they're coming to terms with their futures. Lots of dramatic pauses. Juicy stuff.

Opera is not Bond’s usual cup of tea, but the scenes at Bregenz are pure class.

Bond looks extra suave in his tuxedo and I love when he and Greene's entourage lock eyes and there's a momentary silent stand-off before the action resumes. It's a decent shoot-out too.

Looking uncomfortable, Mathieu Amalric is creepy but unconvincing as Dominic Greene.

He's a callous shit but it's hard to swallow that anyone would believe his story of being an environmental entrepreneur. Hardly a classic Bond villain, more in your Mr Big/Brad Whittaker territory.

A couple of nice nods, I noticed, to The Spy Who Loved Me in this film.

I don't know why Spy was singled out for homage, and it's not entirely unwelcome. The first is Bond's Universal Exports cover name at the docks - Robert Sterling - the same as in Spy. The second one comes at the opera in Bregenz when a henchman is hanging off a building clinging to Bond. Bond ruthlessly knocks his hand away sending him crashing down. I liked that.

Call me old-fashioned but I like my Bond title sequences to at least be legible.

And designed by Daniel Kleinman. Apparently, director Marc Forster wanted his title people of choice, MK12, for this film. And there, ladies and gentlemen, you have the perfect metaphor for this whole film: Marc Forster wanted it his way and his way was crap. I mean, really crap. Thankfully, Mr Kleinman is back for Skyfall.

Ending strongly with the Vesper storyline, Quantum Of Solace is really up and down.

After Casino Royale, the franchise needed continuity but instead Marc Forster got carried away; he tried to reboot the already-rebooted. In wanting to give Bond another shot in the arm, he instead shot him in the foot. And there he is, metaphorically limping across the screen for everyone to see while diehard Bond fans cringe with embarrassment.